I don’t have any true special talents, not visible, show-offy ones. Not ones anyone would really want to claim.

I’m really fucking good at saying the wrong thing at the wrong moment.

I’m amazing at putting my foot in it right up to my knee.

I’m famous for speaking my brains and almost instantly regretting it.

Sometimes I shouldn’t even be opening my mouth, but carry on doing so without any real thought.

And when I’m drunk…….